lowpolydogs:

lowpolydogs:

he’s dark, tall and handsome, has messy hair, a smug grin, and perfect teeth. you know who i’m talking about ;)

image

(Source: lowpolywaluigi, via tessa-matsuoka)

79,413 notes

fartgallery:

readingaroundthemovies:

fartgallery:

i need to date a girl with the initials AG so we can carve SW+AG on benches

Those r my mums initials…,

say hello to your new dad. i see that your tumblr blog contains some vulgar language. you’re grounded

(via pizza)

127,904 notes

verylittlebird:

a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

(via pizza)

117,209 notes

ruinedchildhood:

Mom: Home in 5 minutes, hope you’ve taken the chicken out of the freezer

Me: image

(via thelazykorean)

270,303 notes